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Saturday, July 26, 2014

True Lies

Alcohol History
  1. Sometime after beer was invented, somebody figured out that just boiling water was enough to make it safe to drink, you didn't actually have to make beer out of it. Since people no longer needed to start the day with a tankard of ale, productivity went way up. This was the start of the industrial revolution.
  2. Alcohol was the cause of slavery. Because a free man could drink as much as he wanted, and which he did, thereby becoming drunk and useless, nothing got done. So some wise guy decided that some people's grog should be rationed, so they weren't drunk all the time and the chores would be taken care of. The people who had their grog rations curtailed didn't like it and complained, which led to conflict and iron bars and chains. Hence, slavery.
  3. People aren't any crazier now than they used to be. It's just that more people are sober now and distinguish crazy from drunk. I mean it can be hard to tell the difference, especially when you are drunk.
H/T to Marc.

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